Amazing yet Weird.Weird yet Funny.Everyone Must Read atleast once

[chaitanya]

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Well in this thread All can post Amazing , Weird And Funny Information and pictures Here
I start with some snaps o Unbelievable weird yet true and funny facts
 In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have 'the rule of thumb'
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Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled 'Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden'...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
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The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
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Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S. Treasury.
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Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
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Coca-Cola was originally green.
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It is impossible to lick your elbow.
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Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
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The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
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The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
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Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David, Hearts - Charlemagne, Clubs -Alexander, the Great Diamonds - Julius Caesar
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111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
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If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
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Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested?
A. Obsession
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Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter 'A'?
A. One thousand
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Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All were invented by women.
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Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
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In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... 'goodnight, sleep tight.'
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It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.
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In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England , when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them 'Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down.'
It's where we get the phrase 'mind your P's and Q's'
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Many years ago in England , pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they neededa refill, they used the whistle to get some service. 'Wet your whistle' is the phrase inspired by this practice.
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At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!
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- Now....because it looks weird. Believe it or not, you can read it.
I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in what oredr the ltteers in a word are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is that the first and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it wouthit a porbelm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?

[chaitanya]

Sophisticated Meaning In Mumbaiya Language
--->1. There's a minor problem . Arre yaar, "Waanda" ho gaya
...
--->2. There's a big problem . Arre yaar, "Zol" ho gaya
...
--->3. There's a huge problem .(unsolvable) Arre yaar, "Raada" ho gaya
...
--->4. You'll be surprised . Ekdam "Hill" jayega tu
...
--->5. I am going out of this place . Chal apun "Kaltii" marta hai.
..
--->6. Don't make a fool of others . Dekh , tu "Shendi" mat laga sabko...
--->7. Just get out of here, you oversmart fool!! Chal ae Shaaane, "Hawa" aane
de
...
--->8. I am not a stupid out here . Apun kya "ALIBAUG" se nahi aaya...
--->9. There's some misunderstanding . Arre kuch "Galat Faimili" ho gayi
...
--->10. Do u drink daily? Tu kya roz "FULL TO" hota hai?
--->11. See, You are afraid.. . Dekh , teri to "FAT" gayi
...
--->12. Shall I just bash u? E Du kya "Kharcha Pani" ?
--->13. Just take him into a secret place . Use jara "Kopche" me leke ja..
.
--->14. O .. What a beautiful lady !! Kya "Zakaas Item" hai yaar!!
--->15. What a sensuous/unexplainably sexy lady!! Kya "Raapchik Maal / Piece"
hai yaar!!
--->16. Don't just bluff....OK? Ae Jyaada "RAAG" mat de..
--->17. Ya..she is staring at u.. buddy !!! Kya sahi "LINE" deti hai "Bhiduu"!!
--->18. Don't take much tension.. Jyaada "LOAD" nahi leneka kya??
--->19. Your clothes are very awkward!! Kya "ZAGMAG / DHINKCHAAK" pehna tune?
--->20. I don't care about it much..!! Abe yaar , "Hata Saawan Ki Ghata Kha khuja soja..."
--->21. Please don't overbore me.... Jyaada "PAKAA" mat be tu...
--->22. All this must be done without anyone's notice .
Sab kaam "SUUMVADI" me hona
chahiye...kya?
To kya bolta aap jhakkas hai na

[chaitanya]

It's not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year ONLY
has 365' days.
Typical academic year for a student:
1. Sundays-52, Sundays in a year, you know Sundays are for rest. Days left 313.
2. Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study. Days left 263.
3. 8 hours daily sleep- 130 days GONE. Days left 141.
4. 1 hour for daily playing- (good for health) means 15 days. Days left 126.
5. 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies (chewing
Properly & swallowing)-means 30days. Days left 96.
6. 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means
15 days. Days left 81.
7. Exam days- per year at least 35 days. Days left 46.
8. Quarterly, Half yearly and festival (holidays)-40 days.Balance 6 days.
9. For sickness- at least 3 days. Remaining days=3.
10. and functions - at least 2 days. 1 day left.
11. That 1 day is your birthday.
How can you study on that day???!!!!!!!!!!
Balance = 0
'How can a student pass ??'
Forward 2 all. Every1 would really admire it......Believe me!!!!

[chaitanya]

 Before Marriage ...
Boy: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
Girl: Do you want me to leave?
Boy: NO! Don't even think about it.
Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Of course! Over and over!
Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?
Boy: NO! Why are you even asking?
Girl: Will you kiss me?
Boy: Every chance I get!
Girl: Will you hit me?
Boy: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!
Girl: Can I trust you?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Darling!
After marriage ...
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JUST READ IT FROM BOTTOM TO TOP

[chaitanya]

God created the donkey and said to him.
"You will be a donkey. You will work un-tiringly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence and you will live 50 years."
The donkey answered: "I will be a donkey, but to live 50 years is much. Give me only 20 years"
God granted his wish.
*************************
God created the dog and said to him:
"You will guard the house of man. You will be his best Friend.
You will eat the scraps that he gives you and you will live 30 years.
You will be a dog. "
The dog answered: "Sir, to live 30 years is too much,give me only 15 years."
God granted his wish.
*************************
God created the monkey and said to him:
"You will be a monkey. You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks.
You will be amusing and you will live 20 years. "
The monkey answered: "To live 20 years is too much, give me only 10 years."
God granted his wish.
*************************
Finally God created man ... And said to him:
"You will be man, the only rational creature on the face of the earth.
You will use your intelligence to become master over all the animals.
You will dominate the world and you will live 20 years."
*************************
Man responded: "Sir, I will be a man but to live only 20 years is very little, give me the 30 years that the donkey refused, the15 years that the dog did not want and the 10 years the monkey refused."
God granted man's wish
*************************
And since then, man lives 20 years as a man ,
Marries and spends 30 years like a donkey,
Working and carrying all the burdens on his back.
Then when his children are grown,
He lives 15 years like a dog taking care of the house and eating whatever is given to him,
So that when he is old,
He can retire and live 10 years like a monkey,
Going from house to house and from one son or daughter to another doing tricks to amuse his grandchildren.
That's Life. Is'nt it ?

[chaitanya]

Hi friends!
Check the below paragraph ...
Accidentally I got from one site
read it.
it's interesting.

Quote:
if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too
Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can.
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs isbcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
I had no probs I must have a great mind. Do you
Post ur comments...
----------------

[>Saurabh<]

Woww dats kewl ...nice stuff really.

[chaitanya]

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.
Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost their children while living in the White House.
Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Now it gets really weird.

Lincoln 's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln .
Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.
Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.
John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy,
was born in 1939.
Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.

Now hang on to your seat.

Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford'.
Kennedy was shot in a car called ' Lincoln ' made by 'Ford'.
Lincoln was shot in a theater and his assassin ran and hid in a warehouse.
Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and his assassin ran and hid in a theater.
Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

And here's the kicker...

A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe , Maryland.
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

[chaitanya]

It is common mistake to say that The Great wall of China is visible from outer space. It is too thin to be noticed from such a great distance. There are no man made structures that are visible from space or moon. Man made objects start to disappear after 300 miles up. From that distance you can barely see the outline of the Great China Wall. If we consider that distance from Earthto Moon is around 384,403 kilometers/238,857 miles then we can draw reasonable conclusion that it would be impossible to see any man-made structures from such a distance. Astronaut Alan Bean said: "The only thing you can see from the moon is a beautiful sphere, mostly white (clouds), some blue (ocean), patches of yellow (deserts), and every once in a while some green vegetation. Noman-made object is visible on this scale. In fact, when first leaving earth's orbit and only a few thousand miles away, no man-made object is visible at that point either...
Even in some maps you will see some thin long line shown in china its not actually seen but line drawn by china and accepted in some places only due to power of china and nothing else

[chaitanya]

The filmy laws and ways of playing cricket
Bollywood


Shahrukh, the batsman needs to score 10 runs of 1 ball……………

Bowler bowls it and Shahruk glides it to 3rd man…………..the ball goes to boundary line Shahruk runs for 3 runs, fielder throws at non-striker it misses the stumps and goes for over-throw,Shah Ruk runs again for 3 ,
this time fielder tactic fully throws at Keepers end, Keeper Misses it goes for a 4 runs. In the background Vande Mathram sings….
Shahruk WINS the match……………………………..
.

.

.

.
Tollywood

 
Cheeru ,the batsman needs to score 10 runs of 1 ball……………
Bowler bowls it and Cheeru hits with tremendous power…………..the ball goes far away  and UMPIRES are forced to give 12 runs for that.
Cheeru WINS the match……………………………..
.

.

.

.

Kollywood 


Rajni ,the batsman needs to score 10 runs of 1 ball……………
Bowler bowls it and Rajini hits with tremendous power…………..the ball splits into “TWO”
1 half goes to SIX…..The other half goes to FOUR………..

[Ginig]

awasum man...gr8 collection..maza aa gya

[chaitanya]

Que.- you aRe in a boat in the middle of RiveR.
you have 2 candles & have to light any 1 candle.You don't have anything else  with you in the boat. How will you do it ??


Now if you know the answer then only you are champion otherwise continue reading for answer


Ans- Take 1 candle & thRow it in the wateR.So the boat will become LIGHTER.... using this LIGHTER YOu can light the otheR Candle.
AnotheR deadly ans . . .

U thRow a candle up & catch it. 'Catches win Matches'
Using this Matches you can light the candle.

If that was not enough,1 moRe deadly ans . . .
Take wateR in youR hand & dRop it dRop by dQop(TIP-TIP) "TIP TIP baRsa Pani, Pani ne aag lagayee"
us aag se hamne candle  jalayee.
If that was not enough even uptill now 1 moRe deadly ans . . .
staRt pRaising 1 candle, the otheR will get jealous & jalne lagegi ..
Problem solved
if you have any moRe ans then reply

because

Using youR bRain is stRictly pRohibited 

[chaitanya]

This is hysterical.. You have to try this. It is absolutely true. I
guess there are some things that the brain cannot handle..
HOW SMART IS YOUR RIGHT FOOT ?
You have to try this please, it takes 2 seconds. I could not believe this! It is from an orthopaedic surgeon............ This will confuse your mind and you will keep you trying over and over again to see if you can outsmart your foot, but you can't. It ispre-programmed in your brain!
1. While sitting at your desk in front of your computer, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number '6' in the air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction.

[chaitanya]

==============================

Fraud with Innocent Boys
——— ———————
Fun with Handsome Boys
—— ————————
Friendship with Charming Boys
————— —————
Contact with Intelligent Boys
———— ——————
Flirt with Freaky Boys
—— ————————
Love with Faithful Boys
——– ———————-
in the end
=========
Marriage with the Rich Boy
—————————————–

Moral of the story :

Chandramukhi ho yaa Paaro, Sab Ek jaisi hain Yaaro )

[souvik.ranju]

Nice topic. Keep it up

[chaitanya]

Stay Away From 5 Star Hotels - Reasons:-

Question : "What would you like to have ..Fruit juice, Soda, Tea, Chocolate, Milo, or Coffee?"

Answer: "tea please"

Question : " Ceylon tea, Herbal tea, Bush tea, Honey bush tea, Ice tea or green tea ?"

Answer : "Ceylon tea "

Question : "How would you like it ? black or white ?"

Answer: "white"

Question: "Milk, Whitener, or Condensed milk ?"

Answer: "With milk "

Question: "Goat milk, Camel milk or cow milk"

Answer: "With cow milk please.

Question: " Milk from Freeze land cow or Afrikaner cow?"

Answer: " Um, I'll take it black. "

Question: " Would you like it with sweetener, sugar or honey?"

Answer: "With sugar"

Question: " Beet sugar or cane sugar ?"

Answer: "Cane sugar "

Question:" White , brown or yellow sugar ?"

Answer: "Forget about tea just give me a glass of water instead."

Question: "Mineral water or still water ? "

Answer: "Mineral water"

Question: "Flavored or non-flavored ?"

Answer: "I'll rather die of thirst :-( :-)

[chaitanya]

I wrote your name on sand it got washed.

I wrote your name in air, it was blown away. then

I wrote your name on my heart & i got Heart Attack.



******

God saw me hungry, he created pizza .

He saw me thirsty, he created Pepsi .

He saw me in dark, he created light .

He saw me without problems, he created YOU.



******

Twinkle Twinkle little star

You should know what you are

And once you know what you are

Mental hospital is not so far.



******

The rain makes all things beautiful.

The grass and flowers too.

If rain makes all things beautiful

why doesn't it rain on you?



******

Roses are red, Violets are blue

monkeys like u should be kept in zoo.

Don't feel so angry you will find me there too

not in cage but laughing at you.

[chaitanya]

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America? CLASS: Maria

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L
TEACHER: No, that's wrong.
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE: I is.
TEACHER: No, Millie. Always say, "I am."
MILLIE: Alright. "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.
Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook

 TEACHER:Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No, sir. It's the same dog

TEACHER - convert into passive voice. 'I made a mistake.'
ROGER - 'I was made by a mistake..!'

____________________________________

[.Pikachu.]

rofl

[Shubhamm]

yaar bina line mare reply milta hai aur line marne pe IGonre kara jata hai chakkar kya hai

[chaitanya]

[.Pikachu.]

http://gstek.info/forum/index.php?topic=314.275

[.Pikachu.]

]ME and MY BOSS
  When I take a long time to finish,
 I am slow,
 When my boss takes a long time,
 He is thorough
 When I don't do it,
 I am lazy,
 When my boss does not do it,
 He is busy,
  When I do something without being told,
 I am trying to be smart,
 When my boss does the same,
 He takes the initiative,
  When I please my boss,
 I am apple polishing,
 When my boss pleases his boss,
 He is cooperating,
  When I make a mistake,
 You're an idiot.
 When my boss makes a mistake,
 He's only human.
  When I am out of the office,
 I am wondering around.
 When my boss is out of the office,
 He's on business.
  When I am on a day off sick,
 I am always sick.
 When my boss is a day off sick,
 He must be very ill.
  When I apply for leave,
 I must be going for an interview
 When my boss applies for leave,
 It's because he's overworked
  When I do well,
 My boss never remembers,
 When I do wrong,
 He never forgets
 
HOW TO START YOUR DAY WITH A POSITIVE OUTLOOK

1 . Open a new file in your PC .


2. Name it " Boss "

3. Send it to the RECYCLE BIN

4 . Empty the RECYCLE BIN

5. Your PC will ask you, "Are you sure you want to delete Boss permanently?"

6. Answer calmly, "Yes," and press the mouse button firmly....

7 . Feel better?


(borrowed 4m lina)

[chaitanya]

Great thanks for sharing am still laughing by the way who's lina?

[.Pikachu.]

dunno!!!    original poster of dis stuff!!!!